Courtroom Nine  

Monday-Monday

Attorney Friggen's head pounded.  Monday.  Everybody hated Monday in the Summer. The attorneys hated Monday; the clients hated Mondays (and were always expected to be extremely late); the clerks, court officers and court reporters hated Monday (statistics prove that most clerical and transcription errors occurred on Mondays); and perhaps most importantly, Judge Murphy, who on weekends basked with the celebrities on the "Vineyard," hated Mondays.  No one wanted to suffer Judge Murphy's wrath on Mondays.

Judge Murphy, as expected, took the bench late. That was a good thing. Friggens' three weekend arraignments were equally late. (The calls from his rather obnoxious radio ads had been good of late) Nothing appeared exciting: one driving under the influence, one drug possession (of course, overly charged as possession with intent to distribute), and a five co-defendant case charged with burglary.  The paperwork seemed to take forever. "Those damned clerks..." Friggens thought as his "Jack Daniels" head pounded more.  

"Mr. Friggens are your clients ready to be arraigned?" Judge Murphy bellowed. "No, your Honor....still waiting on the paperwork" Friggens replied quietly. "What do we need paperwork for... we're on the record here... Let's get these arraignments done. This court has important business to do," Murphy retorted as if a proper arraignment of "some common criminal" was not important at all.   Even the District Attorney, a "lend lease" from a big law firm sent to the DA's office for trial experienced was taken aback.

"Yes, your Honor...we can handle Mr. Parsons on the driving under and Mr. Jefferson on the drug possession charges but I think we should wait for the paperwork on the multi defendant......" " OK, Mr. Parsons come to the bench"...Murphy yelled out before Friggens could finish.. "Not guilty plea entered ...bail $500.." .. "But.. But.. your Honor, Mr. Parsons has no record and he voluntarily appeared.." "Mr. Friggens don't argue with me.  Do you want me to make it an even thousand?"...  Before Friggens could even answer Judge Murphy was at it again.. "Mr. Jefferson step to the Bench" (Luckily, Friggens had warned his client's about Murphy's ornery, Monday reputation.)  Mr. Jefferson fared no better.. "Not guilty.. Bail $1000." Murphy exclaimed as he stood up to leave the bench for the morning break. 

When Friggens again protested, Murphy yelled back.. "Look Mr. Friggens, they (the proverbial "they") can afford private counsel, they can afford bail... they should have worried about bail before they did whatever they did.."  As Murphy strutted to his chambers Friggens muttered to himself "whatever happened to the presumption of innocence."

The paperwork for the multi-defendant case was on Murphy's bench when he returned an hour later.. This was no ordinary case as Friggens had imagined. The charge was burglary.... but this was no burglary... Mr. Friggen's client, Peter Lackly, an 18 year old jock from State University and 4 of his buddies had gone to a local, downtown, massage parlor after a night of drinking (and nothing left in their pockets).  After enjoying the services that promised tips would offer, the young lads tried to quickly make an exit.  Mr. Lackly and his buddies were quickly arrested outside following the mad screams from the service providers to the numerous plainclothes police working this known "high crime" area. 

 Apparently, one of the "lend lease" DA's decided to file felony burglary charges based on the fact that the young men entered without lawful invitation (the business inviting only people who intend to pay for services) and at the time of entry were intending to "steal" the services.  

Friggens, whose headache had subsided, smiled as he read the report.  Judge Murphy couldn't contain himself. His laughter echoed through the courtroom.   "Although everyone is used to overcharging, this is a new one... theft it may be.. but burglary no.... maybe its shoplifting?" he mused out load. "Do I have a motion Mr. Friggens"  "You do your honor, move to dismiss."  "Granted... but WITHOUT PREJUDICE" Murphy bellowed as he looked to the "lend lease."  "Let's not be so creative next time, heh."  

Only on Mondays....

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