Courtroom Nine

Sex, Lies and Videotape

March 17th, St. Patrick's day...and as luck would have it ... Judge Murphy was off the bench today. But it was not a court holiday. (Except in Boston, Massachusetts, with its large population of Irish who immigrated by the thousands to that stayed Anglo-Saxon City at the turn of the century, where the politicians had somehow named the day "Evacuation Day," a holiday that no one you ask knows the origin or meaning of...)

Sitting in his place was Judge Suzanne Swift who every defense lawyer in town wanted to swiftly get before to plead his or her client's case. It was not that she "gave away the courthouse." Prior to becoming an attorney at 43 years of age, and her subsequent appointment to the bench at 55, she had been a nun...yes... a nun. Her compassion for human beings stemmed from every good Christian value that she prayed all her life for. She believed that there was good in all mankind and she would do her best to give every defendant who came before her a chance at redemption ... at least on a first offense.

Most DAs hated her.. but since her uncle was a politically connected Cardinal and since the District Attorney was himself a Catholic (although fond of the death penalty) the DA's did little to stop her from hearing criminal cases for fear that they would be called anti-Catholic. They made sure, however, that she kept rotating between courts on the stand-in circuit so they could always go back in front of the sitting judge to try to get a reversal of Judge Swift's decision if it strayed too far for their liking.

Judge Swift, in her most pleasant manner, made quick work of the Daily Calendar. The trial of "People v. Chang Chu" for "Lewd and Lascivious Behavior" (a felony that required those convicted to register with every police department where they lived but which also required the prosecution to prove, beyond a reasonable doubt, that the conduct was "shocking" to the general public) was about to begin..

Apparently, as Officer Wang related to the jury, at approximately 2:30 am.. while he was "traveling southbound on Winter Street in my marked patrol vehicle" in the warehouse district, a district that consisted almost entirely of abandoned shoe factories, ( And the home to the daily rag sheet, "The City Herald," which sought out and published every compromising photograph of every city politician as well as every rumor concerning every alleged "mob" connection even though the "mob" had ceased to exist in this city for over 20 years.) he observed two individuals "going at it" on the top of a car hood in the back of the parking lot of an abandoned warehouse..

Now, Officer Wang didn't actually see the activity while driving his "marked patrol vehicle." (Does anyone ever wonder why police officers don't just say "police car" or even just "car?"). He indicated that he saw some "unusual" activity in the parking lot. He then turned off his car lights, pulled into the lot, and shined his 1000 megawatt search beam at the two dark objects that were on the hood of the car. Only then did he discover the activity the two were engaged in..."they were having intercourse" ("Penis to Vagina" according to his report which both the prosecutor and the defense attorney found necessary to clarify on at least three occasions, perhaps more for their own edification then that of the jury's).

As the evidence continued, the prostitute who Mr. Chu had picked up after a night in the Zone with his friends testified that yes indeed they were engaged in the sexual act the officer described (but only for just a few minutes). Cross-examination of the prostitute, which was little more than her admission that yes indeed she was a prostitute and yes indeed she had received probation once again for her ongoing occupation, was of little help...

Guilty!

But not of Lewd and Lascivious behavior, only of misdemeanor "indecent exposure." Prior to sending the case to the jury, compassionate Judge Swift had found that the more serious charge had not been proven because neither Officer Wang or the prostitute or anyone else who might be floating around that district at that time in the morning, especially the reporters and employees of The City Herald, could hardly be "shocked" by the activity.

Chu, was fined, ordered to watch 8 hours of videos on AIDs and other sexually transmitted diseases and directed by the Judge to perform 20 hours of community service as "penance for his sins.."